Sometimes, when I'm here, everything seems perfect, I feel accomplished because I figured something out. I had a sunny day, or whatever. Small things that make people feel good about life. But other times, I realize that each person holds within them, their version of the world. Everyone can only actually see the world through their own eyes, no matter how open minded a person is, or how much they're able to sympathize. Understanding only goes so far, and, based on your experiences, you have a unique filter.
Today I woke up around 7 after only sleeping a few hours. It took me a while to fall asleep last night, because my muscles were on FI-YER from that yoga class. I was lying completely still trying not to move, and I would twitch from the pain. It was so bad. I could barely lift my fork to eat. This morning, we had a rescheduled appointment for a criminal background check for our student visas. It was very quick and the guy who did mine was very upbeat and mentioned that I was like the girlfriend from Rocky lol. Unfortunately, I had to miss class because of this, and missing out on social interaction is not ideal, especially since they say that the way the system works here is that you have to make friends in order to pass classes, because the professors expect you to teach yourself? Not exactly clear on that. I did make a new friend though on the way to the visa office. There was a homeless tee shirt wearing dog who followed our group all the way there, then to the cafe afterward. I cleverly (lol) named him tee shirt dog. Didn't have my camera today though.
It was still early, so after that, I decided to go pick up a package that had been waiting for me at the post office. The post office was very secretary of state-like and it ended up taking around two hours. I had to pull a number to be seen by one window, turn in the form, then wait to have my number called over a speaker, whereupon I was led to a back room where I picked up my package.. I was glad the box wasn't too big to carry, but it was big enough to be obnoxious to walk with. The process was long and the office was far. I did appreciate the goods inside, but, overall, it's not worth it.
Yesterday, I decided to do some research on Oreos and I found out some very interesting information. You'll all be happy to know that they recently celebrated their 100 year anniversary, and that the Oreo design has changed a bit over the years. Also, Asia has the most interesting flavors, like green tea ice cream, mango, and blueberry. You guys should look this up, it's pretty interesting. Also, an Oreo from the pack my mom sent me was bigger than the one I bough here. I wonder if that's related to portion sizes. I know it seems like I'm obsessed with Oreos lately, but this all just started with me seeking something familiar and Burger King not being the right choice.
Later I went to volleyball practice and was reminded why I don't play volleyball, even intramural, at Michigan. I guess I thought I could just waltz in and play college level sports and it would be fine. I mean, I wasn't HORrible, but I was horrible. I was so happy to be there, I almost didn't care. In High School, I gave up sports to become a theatre geek. How's that working out for me, you ask? We'll see in a few years, when I'm supposed to have a job. Not that I would have tried the pro athlete route. I absolutely love being athletic though, so I'm definitely going back. They'll have to to kick me off the team before I walk away from this. I'm pretty sore and my right wrist is extra swollen, but super worth it.
The older I get, the more I realize how much I was sheltered as a child. I wasn't locked in the basement, not able to have friends sheltered, but there were a lot of things I found out later that I couldn't have imagined before. Sure, I was smart and I knew what things were/meant, but I didn't actually know to what capacity things were physically happening. For example, now that I'm in college, I've heard of people drinking alcohol in middle school and doing drugs and stuff. This may not seem like a big deal to you, but in middle school, the type of thing I would get sent to the office for was my skirt being too short. I didn't even talk back to people. Of course I knew what drugs were and that they were bad, but I didn't understand exactly why they warned against them, because, obviously, why would we do something that could have such a bad outcome? I didn't know that people did drugs for fun. These are things that were beyond me. I had no idea. For me, it was simple. Don't break the law. Don't break the rules. Even in high school, I didn't know people were actually drinking to get drunk until the end of 12th grade. Maybe that's stupid. But I wasn't drinking, so that wasn't my reality. Understand? And drugs??? Who knew the kid next to me in math did cocaine? I didn't even really know about the drugs and partying thing until college. I didn't know those went together. Growing up, I was always been super straight-laced. And I find that I'm still pretty conservative now. I follow rules, I do the speed limit. I didn't even secretly kiss boys when I was younger. For real. I definitely wasn't doing anything that was
actually bad. And there's a difference between things that are bad, and things that your parents just don't want you to do. I didn't try alcohol until this past September-in Canada. I'm also not into the whole "bad boy" thing, so I didn't have anyone ever "show" me that other life either. And in America, the media gets "Ken-dolled" I'm trying to get at, I've never really been unaware of any of these things, I just never lived that life or knew that side of people close to me who lived it, so I never considered it too much.
I'm saying this because, tonight, on my way back from practice, the bus passed a street, where I saw a woman standing on the corner with a short dress, heels, and chin-high boobs. And I thought to myself "haha, she looks like a prostitute" And she did. She looks like what I've been taught that a prostitute looks like from TV and from other people making that joke. Because, in my world, it is a joke. When I'm on campus and it's Halloween and a girl confuses sexy with trashy and I say that she looks like a prostitute, I know she isn't actually. It's just that, that's how the idea of a prostitute dresses. As the bus went along, I noticed another woman, this one with no pants. And I thought I saw a naked woman a few people down, but "no, she's not naked. And this other lady probably just got into an unfortunate situation/is poor." Then we started passing more women on this street and they were more exposed as we went along. Wearing only lingerie, wearing only a thong, breasts out, wearing only a top, completely naked. And for some reason, I still could not understand exactly why these women were standing out here. Honestly. It crossed my mind, of course, but they were being too obvious, and the prostitutes I've seen in Cass Corridor wear sweatpants. Because it's kind of a 'secret'. But then we passed a woman who clearly had a penis, still with a thong on. Then two more 'women' whose penises were just out. And it's kind of strange, because that was the point at which I was able to admit to myself that they all definitely were prostitutes. And it was because I knew that the 'women' with penises were trying to appeal to a certain audience. Here I am, on my way back from volleyball practice, and women, I could tell, not too much older than me, are prostituting. And yes, I know that there are children who prostitute. Like I said, I'm not unaware of these things, but I have never seen a child prostitute, waiting to be picked up. And I'm sure that if I saw some children being sold for sex, it would be very different from me reading about it.
It just made me really consider how the people so close to you, take the same bus, same classes, wear the same shoe brands, fall asleep underneath the very same moon, live in a completely different world.
TB
